pindah rumah

hehe,salam,since my family recently moved out to our new house in pajam,i've decided to migrate into tumblr,so no more blogger after this~:)

wordless wednesday

lost it.missing it,badly :(

happy birthday!:)

i know it's late,hee,sory!

happy bithday sista!aka sakinah mohamad zawahid

may all the happiness in this whole earth fill your life always,

be a good person,

study well,

makan banyak bg gemok,

n senyum sll,which i have a little doubt regarding that~ahahahahahaha!:p

*hadiah,as always,tangguh ok..btw,you should have a blog,or fb,susah aku nk contact,hahaha!

:)

*hafal belom?hehe~kl lom,jom kite same2 hafal! :)

betulkan niat sebelum mulakan semua urusan,put all our efforts on it and the last but not least,bertawakallah pada Allah~insyaAllah,jika sesuatu tu mmg dah ditetapkan untuk kita,mmg xkemane kn,kl x,pasti ade y better for us~trust in Him~:D

*by remembering Him is when the heart finds peace (so true indeed) :)

a happy girl! :)

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”

~albert einstein~

well said,like always.

for all plans that we made,His plans will always be the best.complaining won't do us any better if we don't start to work our butts off to achieve our goals.so,write them down,and work them out!

for being a better person, and start focusing on the purpose of life,nabilah,yosh!

salam maal hijrah everyone,may He bless~

no bake cheese cake,resipi taram aje,haha~

introducing bear-bear!heeee!:p~thank you so much for the surprise!

happy sgt!

(^_____________^)

random

haha,found this~

@ buckingham palace,london~:)

...

enough with planning.things are getting on my nerves now.i rather stay in my comforter once and for all.period.

chilis moist choc cake!can i have this one pretty please....?huhuhu~:(

*i've been on my bed since last nite and my pain is just going nowhere,huhu~

of winter~:)

salam,

waking up late in the afternoon due to my severe headache,and skipped my therapy class,huhu,feel so bad about it since he's too kind for me to ever think about skipping his classes.but knowing that i'll pay no attention in class or end up sleeping in front of my teacher,it's better no to go~nvm,people get sick sometimes right?huhu~ok, guilt has been hitting me up until now~=_="

let's skip about that.winter is here,again.and i've been planning this winter trip to few countries in europe,hee.well,since everything is still a very raw plan,i don't think talking much about it will do better right? well,let's pray for it to really happen~:)

here my list of the places that i must pay a visit before i leave russia forever.

1. paris (✔)
2. london(✔)
3. italy (the whole part of it including capri island!)
4. spain
5. ireland (which i think impossible since i've visited england before and sadly forgotten about ireland and it's beauty~what a waste,i know)
6. praha
7.germany

well,i'll be in two of the unchecked places soon,plus few other countries,can't wait!:)

...

skipping class!:)

hello there,salam~:)


yesterday,instead of wasting hours listening to lecture which i'll never understand or even bother to try to do so,we have been asked by dean office themselves to join this event so called Международный день студентов медицинских вузов г.москвы aka internatinal day for student2 medic la lebey kurg~well,it was fine,nothing much to tell from someone who don't really have any interest towards loud audio sound.haha.


anyway,despite of going to therapy classes 4x per week,which makes me feel like i'm learning to be a doctor,finally,haha,i just spend most of my hours with series of life unexpected everyday. from it,i learnt a lot.i really meant it.life is basically unexpected.you cant hope everything turns out the way you wanted it to be.all of us has the fragile side deep down inside.we try hard to fight it.deny it or even worse pretending we are strong even when we're just an inch from bursting out into pieces.we make mistakes,always.and we face failures,sometimes even with all the efforts we'd given for something that really matters to us.but for whatever it is,we can change things with His will,we cantry to heal our broken hearts,we can try our best to stand up from our falls and start it all over again.don't be afraid.He's always there.He knows the best.i know i did wrote that many times before but you what that really makes me feel better,always.trust Him.find Him cause you know what,He always there,and will never leave you,even when the whole world turn their backs on you~:)

well,few pics stolen from my friend's fb~haha~

my group

well,am having class tomorrow,missing good morning's sleep like seriously~=_="

till the,toodles~

lesson of the day!~:)

conclusion: stop bothering other people's business,no matter the only thing you have in mind is to make things better for his/her own sake n preventing people around from more problems and sakit hati.
 listen here cik nabilah,you are just no one,n people will never listen to you neither look up to you.never,ever.

so bear with it.for almost 1000days to go i guess,kl panjang umoq n kalo things will change~:)

penat,and penat dh.ape2 jelah~

morning beauty~:)

 it was taken this morning.cantik kan,matahari baru nak naek,but dah kol 9.30pg kot~blame russians for abolishing the day light saving,less good night's sleep of mine~sigh2~huhu

since i got my kutu's money for this month,i decided to have a sushi treat for my tummy~and we had too many of them,and ending up with almost 10pieces untouched,haha~brought them back of course.a great day,spending it with loads of food,laughter,and etc2~you don't really have those moments everyday in your life right?:)~

ha,and forgot to mention,i went to therapy class today and guess what,just knew that one of the factors that may contribute to coronary heart disease is people with A type personality aka those who just will work their butt off to accomplish what they want and when things go the other way,they get frustrated frequently,and try to keep all the sadness alone,hahaaha~

lets avoid that,jom,heeee~*takot diri sendri terjebak*

*yummylicious*

trying his best to give a happy face?:p

me aka giant in the making~=_="

p/s: i lost my wallet~:"(

spm fever!

salam,


"Doa memberikan kekuatan pada orang yang lemah, membuat orang tidak percaya menjadi percaya dan memberikan keberanian pada orang yang ketakutan."



Berdoalah kepada Ku, nescaya akan Ku perkenankan bagimu, sesungguhnya orang-orang yang menyombongkan diri dari menyembah Ku akan masuk neraka jahannam dalam keadaan hina dina!
(Al-Mukmin ayat 60)

skang dah musim spm kan,and my little brother hanif dok tgh berexam,dengan demamnye,haih,risau pule,yela,exam lampu isyarat la katekan,penting2!huhu~tp papepn,doakan y terbaik for him,iA,kl ade rezeki xkemanekan~He knows best!:) mak konpem gelabah kerisauan,anak emas intan payungla katekan,hahaha!*JELES* :p

ni muhamad hanif zawahid

neway to anyone who read my blog,all the best in whatever that you're up to,for whatever it is,remember He is the One who has arranged everything at the very first,so do our best and keep on asking for His help and rahmat sbb bak kate kakak usrah baru2 ni,sebanyak mane pon amal kebajikan yang kita buat xsemestinya kita dapat masuk syurga dgn tu sahaja,sbb kalau dihitung mmg xpernah akan cukup,cume dengan rahmat Dia kan,but nevertheless nak dapatkan rahmat Dia bukan sekadar duduk tercongok xbuat ape kan,of course kene usehe and usehe tingkatkan amal kan?hehe~terbanyak "kan" pule~hoho~diri sndri tak baik langsung pon utk cakap,cume nak cuba baikkn diri~hehe~yosh!

nyte2,wassalam~:D

starry night~in my blog jela kan?eheh!;p

fatness!

hideous!

=_="

:"(

ok,it bothers my mind lately.i eat too much,stupid me again,never learn how to minimize my rice consumption.nvm,let's skip to my life here.everything is basically the same,wake up early in the morning,go to class,talk to no one,go back home alone,surf internet,watch my fav series,and truthfully,that's it..life here is nothing but facing it soullessly.i blame no one but myself for it.i don't even seek for something that will cheer my life up.i get disturbed with small things.everything just seems bigger than how it should be.i start to envy everyone around,hate myself for not being thin,pretty,clever etc2.

and especially today,when the stupid inferiority complex has been launching it's missiles without mercy up until now.ok,am exaggerating much right? well,i just opened few of my friends' blogs and i saw these,headshots maybe?huhu..

1. my dear wani :

i'm not popular,but i have good friends. i'm not rich but i have what i need. i maybe not be liked,but i know that i'm loved.

*am i loved by anyone,huhuhu~cm xdok je,huhu~

2. famous blogger: perfect recipe to be beautiful

I’m sorry. 

I’m sorry I don’t have the most perfect skin.
I’m sorry I don’t look like a Victoria Secrets model
I’m sorry I don’t have the best style.
I’m sorry I’m not tall.
I’m sorry I’m not perfectly skinny- 5’7 nor 100 pounds.
I’m sorry I have stretch marks here and there. 
I’m sorry I have bad hijab days. 
I’m sorry that I’m plain.
I’m sorry my eyebrows aren’t thin and perfectly trimmed.
I’m sorry my face isn’t caked in make-up.
I’m sorry that I can never meet society’s standards.

But you know what? 

I don’t need to care about society’s criteria. 
I don’t need people to tell me I’m beautiful.
I don’t need compliments to make me feel better. 
I don’t need a superficial love that can’t withstand a stretch mark here or chub there.
I don’t need to keep sinking into a never ending pit of low self-esteem.

Because I looked to Allah, and He told me the perfect recipe to be Beautiful.
Not just temporarily, but forever. 

“And the servants of the Most Merciful are those who walk upon the earth easily, and when the ignorant address them [harshly], they say [words of] peace,…” [25:63]

“And [they are] those who, when they spend, do so not excessively or sparingly but are ever, between that, [justly] moderate.” [25:67]

“And he who repents and does righteousness does indeed turn to Allah with [accepted] repentance. And [they are] those who do not testify to falsehood, and when they pass near ill speech, they pass by with dignity. And those who, when reminded of the verses of their Lord, do not fall upon them deaf and blind. And those who say, “Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.” Those will be awarded the Chamber for what they patiently endured, and they will be received therein with greetings and [words of] peace.” [25:71-75]

Ya Allah, when the world criticizes me a million times over
Ya Allah, when the world keeps telling me hurtful things
Ya Allah, when the world keeps pushing “ugly” at me.
Give me the courage to hold firm to your Deen. 
Ya Allah, as long as I am beautiful to you, nothing else matters. 

Ya Allah, even when everyone leaves my side, let me take comfort in the fact that
You are closer to me than my jugular vein [50:16]


envy how people can open up their hearts and believing how physical beauty is just temporary,what matters most is the beauty of the heart~it's just so ungrateful of me,questioning what God has been giving me all these times~for that i have amazing people in my life,who keep on loving me unconditionally,including you,i should ask no more..

hu,pray for me,to be better,wassalam.

how to be happy :)

 Al-Ghazali said, "If you see Allah, Mighty and Magnificent, holding back this world from you, frequently trying you with adversity and tribulation, know that you hold a great status with Him. Know that He is dealing with you as He does with His Awliya' and chosen elite, and is watching over you, have you not heard His saying: "And be patient, [O Muhammad], for the decision of your Lord, for indeed, you are in Our eyes. And exalt [Allah] with praise of your Lord when you arise." [Quran: 52:48]

just be happy with what Allah has planned for you and accept it with an open heart,coz indeed,you will be the happiest one~:)

btw,its snowing heavily today in moscow and its a white,winter wonderland out there!hehe~

and for me and many people here i assumed,winter is =hibernation=eat+sleeeeeep!heeee!:)

membina keluarga?

salam....

i currently watch parenthood.ok,based on the title,of course dh tahu kan series ttg family,hati,perasaan,ho3,snanye since kat malaysia aku dok nengok cite ni,and aku sorg je y dok melayan sbb y laen kate cite ntah pape,haha,i guess my taste is just so weird kot,but at least better dr mamat2 korea,or cite chenta korea zaman dl kale or makcik2 korea bgosip,nanges2 dan seumpamanya~haha!

gamba sikit~haha~

ha,ckp psl cite ni,bg aku everything about it aku suke,lagi2 bile mmg bkisar pasal sume ahli keluarge y mmg  masing2 kepale len2,mcm2 ragam,and cmne depe handle masing2 punye perangai,mmg best laa sbb bg aku mmg cm real life.and dalam the whole big family tu aku paling suke mak ayah dpe,sbb dorg dh tua,and still syg sangat each other,even msing2 ade byk kelemahan y obvious kot tapi still,depe appreciate ade each other and usehe untuk keep each other around until the very end,kagum2~

skang banyak dengar kawan2 aku y dh kawin,akan kahwin,sebuk kumpul duit nak dirikan masjid,xnk susahkan mak ayah,n etc2...hepi utk dorg,sgt and jealous sbb how they can find the love of their life y boleh janji nk hidup ngn ko iA,smpai hujung nyawa~n cmne sanggup amek responsible besar tu skang,sbb bg aku still mude la kl baya aku ni~kadang2 rase cm xreal je ade org yang sanggup spend the whole life dgn kerenah psgn die..ntah,smpai skang pon bg aku mende tu impossible,at least untuk aku lah...

okay,nk smbung layan lg satu episode before tdoq,adios!

conclusion:sile mulekan tabung anda utk dapatkan anak angkat!:)

so silly,hehe

if you really are something to someone,he/she will just do anything to make you stay,
guess you are just not that important,stupid heart~hehe~

:)

salam,

its raya korban today,and i'll be off to spartiv for my usrah and got invited to wadi's open house in the evening,guess i'll be spending more time digging on the food today!*since smlm xcukup makan,hohoho~

and tomorrow,my new cycles are starting.therapy and war medicine,the later one is soo not important*sigh*.nvm,think i should put myself in a well-organized self-schedule*which i never had before*.seriously,things need to change,i'm focusing on myself here,kinda lost these days.

p/s: missing my mum,family members so much today,huhu!:(

0_0

so hideous,that i can't face the mirror anymore.



anyway,slmt hari raya haji~:)

unhealthy post,definitely.

sometimes,you just can't help yourself from feeling so alone and unwanted.especially when your own friends  *very few of mine* forget your birthday,don't even bother about giving you presents or even wish you.but that is still nothing compared to the feeling when someone so dear to your heart/bestie/whatever etc2 told you that she doesn't even have a friend around her that she can look up to.a friend that can be a reason for her to be better.yup.a huge slap on my face,and seriously,it hurts a lot,more than failing my ophtal exam,or anything equals to that.and i did cried,and am still crying,hardly.sigh.

and at this very moment,my inferiority complex just take a rule of my life back.and here you go,sorry for feeling this way but it just how i see myself in the mirror.all i can see is a reflection of a girl who is just nobody to anyone,stupid medical student who just failed her ophtal exam, a damn bad girl who is just an eyesore to everyone around her and definitely so hideous and freaking ugly person who just worth NOTHING.and to tell you the truth,i hate myself more than anything.

it's definitely a very unhealthy post to anyone.stay away from my blog for a moment i suggest.sorry.

and to my friends,i'm sorry for being a bad friend of yours.sorry for being completely useless. sorry for having a friend like me.

luahan.

salam and hello there.

i woke up at 6.30 am today.seriously,since russia abolished day-light-saving which i found nonsense *i really meant it here peeps*,i headed to ophtal department with the most reluctant feeling ever,and ended up forgetting my phone.and plus not to forget,i was stuck for almost an hour in the metro,getting all sweaty due to my chest pain.it's starting to get more severe day by day and i just cant get my mind off that one fine day,i'll fell off the ground and die there.okay,i'm exaggerating here,but it might happen right,who knows kan?

and the worst scenario is,of course,i didn't passed my exam.it felt so bad, that i might have slammed the metro station's door on someone's face.unintentionally of course.and i got myself stumbled up and fell off the ground,but luckily,i'm still alive.alhamdulillah.and not to forget,i dropped my pizza which filled with the most udang on the very top of it.yeah,headshots right?and many times at once.hu3.not the best day ever in my life,but,still,i kind of proud of myself today,you guys might think i'm a lunatic right,but the only reason i'm feeling this way is i didn't even cry a single tear for today!it's a huge achievement for me,at least.well,His plans,they are completely the best for us,and i guess i have to work harder and pray harder.

nvm,let's skip the past and move forward, november is here friends!and zulhijjah too,which already the 5th one today.

''hari2 sepuluh zulhijjah lebih baik drpd hari2 sepuluh dr ramadhan, dan malam2 sepuluh terakhir ramadhan lebih baik dari malam2 zulhijjah'' --ibnu taimiyah

just to remind myself,and maybe let's do these together jom?heee!:)~5 days left,treasure them jom!

1. tasbih. tilawah al-quran.
2. solat sunat.
3. puase .
4. qurban.
5. qiam.
6. sedekah.
7. taubat.




yosh.k bye,salam,mau tdo and lupe segala,besok hari yang baru,iA~:)

HIS sweet plan~:)

the lesson of the day.believe in that :D

alhamdulillah~

masalah otak

i might say this for so many times this week,but here you go again,sincerely,i'm growing so much hatred for ophtal,so hard to handle so that i've made up my mind dat i'll boil the book and make a good juice out of it instead...urghh!mcq was so hard and plus,will have to answer with the "nicest" teacher this tuesday,incase i pass the mcq lah,kl x,lingkup la~

all the diseases seem so similar and now,am having so much difficulties to differ them~

wish me luck people,i think my brain is definitely still on it's hibernation period after my topan finished last month.seriously,it doesn't even want to work anymore!=_="

p/s:it's zulhijjah now,and let's treasure the first ten days of it!:)

modern fam!:D

it's all about accepting people that you love just the way they are and improving yourself  for the sake of their happiness!great series anyhow,highly recommended by me,ahaks!

and lily,the gays' baby *adopted of course * is just way too adorable,kdg2 aku pon confuse baby betul ke mainan,sbb siyes diam gile,xgerak,xnangis,xbuat ape~hahaha!but still,comeyll!:)

overall cite ni mmg best cm how i met your mother gitu!:p

p/s: btw,mcq ophtal seriously susah,huk,maybe sbb aku dok pi tengok cite ni even mlm before exam and 2series pagi before p amek exm,hahaha!*matilah aku selase ni,cm xpass je,haih*

..

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

i should never get involved.

stupid me,like always.

bola bola api~:p

tang yuan





looks so nyums!soon will try doing it!:p

kacak~:p

jam cantik tu....hehehe~:p~thanks dear for today,it has been a great day!:)

long legs!:p

best ni wat pelok malam2 kan tym sejuk2!:p

p/s: sonok bile dpt buat org len happy!it feels great!:)

update~

keep on blooming and make me happy little flowers..:)

being so happy at this moment and for that thank you Allah~:)

:))

you might not hear sweet words of how sweet,charming,kind,good hearted ,lovable,etc2 you are to me,

because the truth is you are just way beyond that,

you are just simply amazing~

:)

sakit rumah?

bile kite dah duduk jauh dari rumah ni,hati senang sgtlah nak homesick kan...kl aku la,plg sll homesick kl tym hari hujan,sejuk,pstu jalan balik sorg2,or kene kuar umah pg2 tym gelap,angin kuat cm ombak tsunami~haha!siyes,tym2 tuh mmg cm nak nangis,knapelah aku kene jalan tgh2 snow ni,sorg2,lah kiri kanan org rambut perang,hidung mancung,mule lah nak balikkkkkk!huhu~

ckp psl homesick,1st tym aku start kenal word ni tym nak masuk form4..1st tym aku dok separate ngn makayah,before ni dok bwh ketiak mak je,sekolah mak anta,balik mak amek,bile nk msuk f4 tuh,family aku kene pindah kajang,so nk taknak tpkselah aku masuk hostel skolah aku kat kuantan tu (SMART namenye)~hehehe~hari2 kot aku kol umah,lam kelas nangis,tym rehat cpt2 kol,nanges2 nak balik~huhuhu~malu je igt balik...xsmpai sebulan,tup2 ak dpt offer msuk sbp,n ap y lg best,satu skolah ngn adik aku,hahahaha,pastu mmg dh xd lgsung la sindrom homesick2 ni,terus "tuff" kot!hahaha!

org ckp home is where our heart is kan?mmglah,sbb harte karun plg mahal kot ade~hehe~so treasure them as long they are still with us,syg sepenuh hati sbb ape2 pon jadi,jauh mane pon kite p,last2 kat dorg jugak kite nak balik kan?sbb without them,sumenye will never complete~:)

bekal!:)

the best lauk ayam ever in 2 months!i guess i can't get married yet.your cooking skills are far way better than mine,haha,malu2~:p

btw,thanks so much for the warm food,sodap sgt,terharu den~

:)

anyway,

dear you,

let's not lose each other ever ok?
:)

the gift

if i'm not mistaken,as far as my mind could rewind back all the memories that have been saved in it,these small creatures never show any attractions to me,as i never really did the same.haha,such a cold hearted person.haha.well,not this time i guess.the later part is changing slowly since my 3 weeks of learning obs as my latest cycle.oh,and not to forget,my sensitivity towards them certainly remarks a great increase especially when  i see a baby being successfully delivered,and watching the tears of the happy mothers,haha,you know how it feels kan?:p

well,i'm being really honest here.i'm not a sensitive,motherly type of girl but for me they are so beautiful,and having them as part of your life is the biggest bless.treat them with all of your love,not slashing them up with knife.how irresponsible a human being called woman can be.i read the news in fb just now.marah gile kot.hu.have some love people,and use ur brain!*sigh

hate is easy,love certainly takes courage

p/s:missing home

*sigh*

(T__T)

kalanchoe calandiva

malas nak edit,it's my new baby to care btw~:)

stay healthy,and make me happy,i'll look after you with all my best!promise!:)

happy anniversary!

just got back from class,5 hours of ophthalmology was seriously tiring and killing my brain~

and guess what,my annual routine just took place again,and today was when i just got out of the metro.

seriously,when you got yourself punched by a male stranger soo many times,there is just nothing left to feel.

i just walked away emotionless like there was nothing happened to me.i was hit,on my arm,by a big guy,i dont think he's a russian,and the punch was quite hard,i guess some of the crowd stopped by and looking surprised,hahaha,famous enough to get noticed?

well,i guess my endurance for pain has been developing so well here,or maybe my heartache just too dominant enough to erase other sensations?

a happy day!

this beautiful life that i have with soo many precious people around me,i shall cherish each and every moment and make the best out of it.

and nabilah zawahid,for every reason that lies in everything that happens,just believe that Allah know the BEST and for that dear heart,bersabar dan bersyukurlah.

(^^,)

remember this wallet in previous post,i got it today!thanks to you mr u-know-who-u-are~:)))

LOVE IT SOO MUCH!

thanks for the payung the other day~and for your willingness to wear that raincoat instead of letting me get soaked up by the rain :")

home versi 2

tiap tahun aku cakap:

" aku xnak balik Malaysia winter neh,aku nak gi jalan2 serate europe,bile lagi,pasni balik malaysia bukannye konpem duit byk bertambun2 boley nk bersiar2,ntah mase ade ke idok pon tak konpem.balik Malaysia buat ape?melangut kat rumah,gemok pastu tup2,balik moscow balik bersame few kilos yang melekat kemas,xterbuang"

but bile tibe waktu2 ni,autumn yang cantik dah mule hilang,jalan mule becak dengan hujan yang turun xhenti2 menyambut kedatangan salji,mule lah hati resah gelisah,teringat kat rumah,bosan dok sorg2 kat sini,etc2~haih~aku rase ntah tibe2 aku terbeli tiket qatar yang murah xsampai 2ribu ringgit pergi balik malaysia tu,who knows kan,when everything just a mess,home is always the best solution,at least,for me~
lagi2 skang depe dok sibuk2 nak pindah rumah baru,rumah sendiri tu lepas bertahun2 menyewe kat kajang~phewwww~:)

anyhow,best gile dpt ckp ngn my bestie forever gtu,si timoh!rase hlg sgale tension wlaupon xd lah tension ats dsr2 yang bagus n boley dterime akal pon~hahaha~nak pecah perut aku gelak,haha,xsabaq nak pi lawat dye,iA~

k,melalut byk,bye,salam~:)